Self Talk is not Abnormal
Almost everybody talks to themselves. And no--we are not all crazy. It is unusual not to talk to yourself.Intense and difficult tasks, such as working at the computer or preparing for speeches, and uncertainty bring out the self-talk in all of us. And we like to do it most in bed, in the car, or in front of a mirror.
Self-talk is the endless stream of thoughts that run through your head every day. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist.
Self-talk is our internal dialog—the words we say to ourselves. These words reflect and create our emotional-physiological states. We can feel confident or nervous, motivated or discouraged, often depending on what we tell ourselves. Self-talk can influence self-esteem, outlook, energy level, performance and relationships with others. It can even affect health, determining how we react to stress, and how easily we change bad habits such as smoking, overeating, or drinking.
Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information. When the theme of your self-talk is mostly negative, your own misperceptions, lack of information and distorted ideas have overpowered your capacity for logic and reason. But if you weed out misconceptions and irrational thinking and challenge them with rational, positive thoughts, your self-talk will gradually become realistic and self-affirming.
Positive self-talk gives you strong new messages to help you overcome long-time fears and obstacles - speak more comfortably in front of groups, become more confident around others, and look, act, and feel more in control.Self talk, or the words our inner dialogue uses when we think, can increase our stress levels, limit our potential, and color our experience with a negative pen.
Thoughts precede moods so if you think unhappy thoughts you feel unhappy. Self talk is your thoughts making themselves known to you. Hearing somebody else talking negatively is bad enough so imagine how much more hearing your own inner voice is. If you tell yourself you are a failure, guess what, you will be! If you tell yourself you can succeed then you have a much improved chance of succeeding.Negative self talk can lead to low self esteem, no confidence or even depression and this leads to more negative thought. A vicious circle.
Confident children are less likely to become victims. Teach your child how to use "self talk," which is a silent pep talk one can use when feeling picked on. The child should pick something good about him- or herself and think about that during hard moments. Focus only on problems.This is the essence of complaining. We dwell on the problem, instead of solutions. Instead: Assume most problems have solutions, and ask "How do I want this situation to be different?"
Positive thoughts sow positive actions. One of the secrets of coping with stress is to get control of our minds and intellects. It can help to take the time to work out our goals, values and priorities, be realistic about our own limitations, manage our time better, and replace the 'negative self talk' that we are using to sabotage our self confidence with a more positive.
You can learn to turn negative thoughts into positive ones. The process is simple, but it takes time and practice.Throughout the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.Sometimes self talk can help your child with bullies.Self talk gives yourself a silent pep talk, reminding yourself of positive things. For example, you might think of something like, "I may not be good at track, but I'm great in band."
Mental and emotional health is multi-faceted. In the same way that mental illness can affect the emotions (depression and anxiety) or the intellect (psychosis) so mental well being involves the development of both emotional and intellectual capacities. Indeed it is often difficult to separate the two. The ability to think clearly about a problem and to come to a rational solution can help very much in the effort to feel better about it. Replacing negative attitudes about yourself with 'positive self talk' is important in feeling better about yourself.
To maintain positive self-talk, fill your mind with uplifting ideas. Recognize your strengths. Comfort yourself when things go wrong. Let your self-talk be like the soothing, supportive words of a counselor, friend, or mentor. As you improve your self-talk, commit to changing your actions accordingly. Lasting accomplishments come when we change our behaviors as well as our thinking